
"Allah
knows
the
deceit
of
the
eyes
and
all
that
which
the
hearts
conceal."(50:19)
Allah
is
aware
of
the
surreptitious
movement
of
the
eye
as
it
casts
a
lustful
glance.
He
is
also
aware
of
the
evil
thoughts,
ideas
and
images
that
are
conjured
up
in
the
heart.
The
realisation
that
Allah
is
aware
of
these
nefarious
activities
creates
a
sense
of
shame,
regret
and
guilt
within
the
heart
resulting
in
taubah
(repentance).
This
verse
is
therefore
a
wonderful
prescription
for
people
suffering
from
the
malady
of
lustful
gazes
and
thoughts.
However,
this
remedy
is
only
effective
when
applied
practically
over
a
period
of
time.
Constant
meditation
upon
the
contents
of
this
aayah,
coupled
with
zikrullah
(the
remembrance
of
Allah)
and
wazaif
(daily
incantation),
will
develop
the
desired
level
of
determination
to
abstain
from
this
sin.The
original
and
the
only
cure
from
all
spiritual
aliments
is
determination
and
willpower.
Mere
zikr
and
meditation
are
not
sufficient
to
eradicate
spiritual
diseases.Those
treading
the
path
of
Allah’s
pleasure,
the
Salikeen
(devotees)
and
Muslims
at
large,
should
understand
well,
that
the
closer
a
person
draws
towards
satisfying
the
unlawful
desires
of
his
nafs
(the
carnal-self),
the
further
he
draws
away
from
Allah.
Hence,
this
mortal
enemy
is
to
be
kept
under
surveillance
and
control
at
all
times.
In
short,
any
object
whereby
the
nafs
derives
pleasure
should
be
discarded
at
once.
Even
a
little
unlawful
pleasure
for
the
nafs
is
not
free
from
imminent
danger
and
calamity.
A
little
opportunity
for
an
enemy
is
surely
destructive
-
the
nafs
is
the
greatest
enemy
-
greater
than
the
Satan
himself.
The
nafs
gains
strength
and
courage
from
little
pleasures
and
grows
stronger
and
stronger
in
this
way,
until
it
eventually
drags
the
Saalik
and
Mu’min
(believer)
into
major
sins.
Aided
by
the
poisonous
doses
of
satanic
ideas
and
whispers,
the
nafs
grows
bold
and
rebellious
and
overpowers
the
person,
leaving
him
helpless
to
resist
the
temptation
of
sin
and
transgression.
It
is
for
this
reason
that
one
saintly
poet
warns:
"Place
no
trust
upon
the
deadly
carnal-self
(nafs)
even
though
it
become
as
obedient
as
an
angel;
Always
remain
suspicious
of
its
motives."
The
first
step
is
committed.
The
nafs
has
won
the
battle
of
wills.
The
eyes
are
the
next
to
follow
in
its
wake.
The
second
step
towards
zina
(adultery
or
fornication)
is
in
progress.
Do
we
succumb
or
do
we
abstain?
This
step
is
the
one
which
sends
us
down
in
to
the
bowels
of
evil.
Do
we
fall
or
do
we
persevere?
It
is
reported
in
a
Hadith
Qudsi
(a
Hadith
in
which
the
Holy
Prophet
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
narrates
from
Allah),
"The
(evil)
gaze
is
a
poisonous
arrow
from
the
arrows
of
Iblis.
He
that
abstains
from
it
out
of
my
fear,
I
will
grant
him
in
return
such
Imaan
(faith),
the
sweetness
of
which
he
will
experience
within
his
heart."
(Ibn
Katheer)
Hazrat
Jareer
radiyallahu
anhu
enquired
from
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
regarding
the
accidental
gaze.
He
replied:
"Turn
away
your
gaze
(Immediately
thereafter)."
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
said:
"To
gaze
at
a
strange
(ghair
mahram)
women
is
zina
of
the
eyes,
To
listen
to
passion-stirring
words
is
zina
of
the
ears,
To
converse
with
a
strange
women
(and
derive
pleasure
thereof)
is
zina
of
the
tongue,
To
touch
a
strange
women
is
zina
of
the
hands,
To
walk
towards
her
is
zina
of
the
feet,
The
heart
desires
and
craves;
The
sexual
organ
then
either
testifies
to
these
or
denies
them."
(Muslim)
Note:
It
is
only
through
protection
of
these
organs
that
the
heart
and
private
parts
will
be
protected;
just
as
the
country
whose
borders
are
unguarded
is
prone
to
attacks
on
its
headquarters
and
vital
installations.
It
is
apparent
from
the
Hadith
that
an
accidental
gaze
is
forgiven,
but
to
continue
staring
thereafter
is
forbidden.
The
gaze
should
immediately
be
turned
in
another
direction.
One
way
for
a
person
indulged
in
evil
gazing
is
that
he
makes
a
habit
of
performing
a
particular
deed
for
a
certain
amount.
No
matter
how
small
that
deed
is,
it
will
still
show
its
effect.
For
example
one
should
make
an
oath
that
every
time
my
eyes
fall
upon
a
ghair
mahram
(one
with
whom
marriage
is
permitted)
with
lust
I
shall
say
‘Astaghfirullah’
ten
times.
Now
do
not
decrease
or
increase
this
amount.
Just
practice
it
for
a
few
times
and
see
for
yourself.
"Tell
the
believing
men
and
women
to
lower
their
gazes
and
protect
their
private
parts.
That
is
purer
for
them."
(24:30)
In
this
verse
Allah,
has
mentioned
the
controlling
of
the
private
parts
in
conjunction
with
the
protection
of
the
gaze,
illustrating
thereby
that
the
controlling
of
the
private
parts
is
based
upon
the
protection
of
the
gaze.
He
who
does
not
protect
his
gaze
is
bound
to
lose
control
over
his
sexual
desires.
Wherefore
then,
are
we
to
go?
Are
we
committed
irrevocably
to
following
up
on
the
sins
of
our
nafs
and
eyes?
Or
is
there
still
hope
of
redeeming
ourselves?
The
testosterone
and
adrenaline
is
pumping
away,
there
is
a
beautiful
woman
before
us,
what
do
we
do?
The
Prophet
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
through
his
wisdom
and
the
guidance
of
Allah
shows
us
how
to
counter-parry
the
stealthy
attack
of
Satan
with
these
enlightening
words:
"When
any
of
you
happened
to
look
at
a
beautiful
woman
that
attracted
him,
he
should
resort
to
his
wife
and
fulfill
his
desire
with
her,
for
they
both
possess
the
same
object
of
fulfilling
his
desire."
(Mishkat)
Hazrat
Moulana
Nanotwi
rahmatullahi
alaihe
states,
"The
gaze
should
only
be
utilised
to
the
extent
of
necessity
and
never
to
attain
unlawful
pleasure,
for
pleasure
has
no
limitation
and
he
that
craves
for
it,
will
never
attain
satisfaction
and
contentment.
Only
the
person
that
fulfils
his
desires
within
the
limitations
of
necessity
can
attain
true
contentment.
Thus
the
endowments
of
a
strange
women
are
no
different
from
that
of
a
one’s
own
wife,
to
differentiate
between
the
two
is
but
the
deception
and
trickery
of
Satan."
(At-Tasharruf
Vol.3)
Hazrat
Thanwi
rahmatullahi
alaihe
advises
that,
an
illicit
love
affair
is
in
reality
an
affliction
and
calamity
from
Allah,
as
a
result
of
which
the
rooh
(soul)
becomes
greatly
agitated
and
tormented,
sleep
becomes
haraam,
the
thought
of
the
beloved
constantly
haunts
the
mind
and
a
state
between
life
and
death
prevails
over
the
heart
-
a
condition
that
can
veritably
be
compared
to
that
of
the
people
of
Jahannam.
Also
he
mentions,
falling
in
love
with
a
handsome
lad
is
much
more
severe
than
an
illicit
love
affair
with
a
woman.
It
is
possible
that
some
day
he
may
marry
the
woman,
but
when
two
males
are
involved,
no
such
possibility
exists.
When
the
nafs
begins
to
take
a
fancy
to
a
certain
form
of
figure,
Satan
grasps
the
opportunity
and
amplifies
the
beauty
of
the
desired
object
manifold
in
the
imagination
of
the
fancier.
Eventually
the
evil
deed
is
committed
and
it
is
only
then
the
balloon
of
amplified
beauty
is
burst.
Now
what
seemed
to
be
extreme
beauty
is
nothing
but
an
illusion.
Gazing
at
the
object
now
evokes
feelings
of
contempt
and
nausea.
Hazrat
Thanwi
rahmatullahi
alaihe
further
states,
"When
man
inclines
towards
a
form,
it
becomes
embedded
in
his
mind
and
heart.
He
may
thereafter,
recite
as
many
‘La
Hawla’
as
he
desires
and
blow
on
his
chest,
he
will
not
attain
salvation
from
this
malady
since
his
reading
is
bereft
of
sincerity
and
a
firm
resolve
to
abstain
from
this
evil."
"And
come
not
near
unto
adultery,
verily!
It
is
an
obscenity
and
an
evil
way."
(17:32)
In
this
verse
Allah
has
prohibited
us
from
even
approaching
zina
(adultery);
thus
educating
us
to
the
fact
that:
any
cause
that
leads
up
to
a
haraam
act
is
also
haraam,
and
thus
is
to
be
totally
avoided.
Human
instinct
is
such
that
no
sooner
does
a
strange
man
and
woman
meet
in
privacy
that
a
sensation
of
mutual
attraction
develops
from
stage
to
stage,
from
mere
affection
to
uncontrollable
passion
and
ultimately
into
the
irreversible
stage,
where
it
is
almost
impossible
to
control
the
nafs,
and
finally
the
shameful
deed
of
zina
is
perpetrated.
Thus
Allah
has
made
easy
upon
us
the
beautiful
pathway
to
chastity,
purity
and
piety
(taqwa),
by
declaring
unlawful
all
those
factors
that
contribute
to
the
commission
of
zina.
The
solution
is
simple;
marriage,
a
fortress
against
all
evils
of
the
loins.
Ibn
Haban
has
narrated
from
Anas
radiyallahu
anhu
and
he
has
narrated
from
the
Holy
Prophet
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
that:
"On
a
child’s
seventh
day,
his
aqiqah
will
be
performed,
he
will
be
named
and
his
hair
will
be
removed.
Then,
when
he
reaches
six
years
of
age,
he
will
be
trained
in
etiquette.
When
he
reaches
the
age
of
nine,
his
bedding
will
be
separated
and
when
he
reaches
the
age
of
thirteen,
he
will
be
struck
on
missing
salaah
and
saum.
When
he
reaches
the
age
of
sixteen,
the
father
should
get
him
married
and
then
should
take
his
hand
and
say,
‘I
have
taught
you
etiquette,
I
have
educated
you,
I
have
got
you
married.
I
seek
refuge
with
Allah
from
your
calamities
in
the
world
and
your
punishment
in
the
Hereafter."
"Had
it
not
been
for
the
grace
and
mercy
for
Allah
upon
you,
none
of
you
would
have
ever
been
purified,
but
Allah
purifies
whomsoever
he
desires
to."
(24:21)
From
this
aayah
it
becomes
apparent
that
together
with
striving
to
attain
spiritual
purification,
it
is
also
essential
to
attain
the
grace
and
mercy
of
Allah.
We
have
to
constantly
entreat
and
implore
Him
for
His
mercy
and
beg
Him
to
include
us
amongst
those
whom
he
has
purified.
Hazrat
Moulana
Rumi
rahmatullahi
alaihe
writes,
"O’
Allah!
If
a
thousand
chains
of
carnal
desires
and
satanic
deceptions
have
shackled
our
feet,
we
have
nothing
to
fear
if
your
grace
is
upon
us."
Hazrat
Ukaaf
radiyallahu
anhu
reports
that
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
said,
"Karfas
was
an
aabid
(devout
worshipper)
who
lived
on
the
seashore
and
remained
engaged
in
worship
(ibadah)
for
three
hundred
years;
fasting
during
the
day
and
worshipping
during
the
night.
Once
he
became
infatuated
with
a
woman
as
a
result
of
which
he
eventually
became
a
kaafir
and
discarded
all
his
ibaadah.
Allah
saved
him
from
this
misfortune
through
some
of
his
good
deeds
and
forgave
him."
Thereafter
addressing
me
(Ukaaf)
he
said:
"O’
Ukaaf!
Marry
or
else
you
will
be
at
a
loss."
As
a
result
of
not
marrying,
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
termed
Hazrat
Ukaaf
as
‘The
brother
of
Satan.’
And
then
he
said,
"The
greatest
weapon
of
Satan
against
the
pious
is
women."
Thereafter
Hazrat
Ukaaf
married.
(Jam’ul-Fawaid
p.571)
In
one
Hadith,
he
said,
"The
worst
of
you
are
those
who
are
unmarried
(Despite
possessing
the
means
to
marry),
the
worst
of
those
that
die
amongst
you
are
the
unmarried."
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
said,
"A
destitute
is
he,
who
has
no
wife."
The
Sahaabah
radiyallahu
anhum
enquired,
"Even
though
he
may
possess
much
wealth?"
He
replied
in
the
affirmative.
Thereafter
he
said,
"A
destitute
is
she
who
has
no
husband."
The
Sahaabah
radiyallahu
anhum
enquired,
"Even
though
she
may
possess
much
wealth?"
He
replied,
"Even
though
she
may
possess
much
wealth."
(Targheeb)
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
said,
"The
whole
world
is
an
object
of
use
and
benefit,
and
the
best
means
of
benefit
is
a
pious
woman."
Rasoolullah
sallallahu
alaihe
wasallam
said,
"Do
not
marry
women
solely
for
their
beauty
or
wealth,
because
beauty
may
lead
her
towards
evil
(Infidelity)
and
wealth
will
cause
her
to
rebel
and
disobey.
Thus
make
deen
the
criterion
and
marry
religious
(pious)
women."
<font color="brown>Questions
and
Answers:
Some
questions
taken
from
a
book
of
Moulana
Yusuf
Ludhyanwi
Question:
What
is
the
age,
in
which
contracting
marriage
becomes
an
obligation,
for
a
man
and
women?
I
have
been
informed,
that
when
a
girl
reaches
the
age
of
16
and
the
boy
the
age
of
25,
they
should
be
married.
Answer:
According
to
Islamic
law
(Shari’ah)
there
is
no
fixed
age
to
get
married.
Parents
if
they
so
desire,
can
give
their
child
in
marriage
before
he/she
has
even
reached
the
age
of
puberty.
If
a
child
after
attaining
puberty,
strongly
feels
that
he/she
will
commit
sin
in
the
case
of
him/her
not
getting
married
then
marriage
is
wajib
(obligatory)
for
him/her,
apart
from
the
above
mentioned
case,
marriage
never
becomes
wajib.
However
in
order
to
remain
safe
and
immure
from
the
filth
of
society.
It
is
commendable
and
highly
praised
if
one
gets
married.
It
is
stated
in
'Durrul
Mukhtar'
that
if
an
individual
is
absolutely
certain
that
if
he/she
does
not
get
married,
he/she
will
fall
into
committing
sins,
then
marriage
is
compulsory.
If
the
feeling
of
committing
sin,
is
very
strong
the
marriage
becomes
obligatory
(providing
he
can
afford
the
dowry
and
expenses)
on
the
other
hand,
if
one
feels
absolutely
certain
that
he/she
will
be
unjust
and
cruel
if
he/she
gets
married
then
marriage
is
absolutely
forbidden
for
him/her.
If
he/she
is
not
very
sure
about
this
feeling
then
marriage
is
makrooh-e-tahrimi
(highly
disliked)
and
in
all
normal
circumstances
marriage
is
sunnat-e-muakkidah
(an
emphasised
sunnah).
Question:
My
parents
have
concluded
that
education
is
everything.
I
am
presently
very
young,
but
I
have
elder
sisters
who
are
acquiring
higher
education.
In
spite
of
the
age
of
my
sisters
my
parents
have
not
at
all
turned
their
attention
towards
their
marriage.
Another
serious
factor
is
that
my
parents
are
also
advancing
in
age.
As
I
mentioned,
I
am
presently
young,
by
the
time
I
grow
up
my
sisters
will
be
well
past
there
prime.
And
past
the
stage
in
which
marriage
propositions
are
submitted.
Presently
marriage
proposals
are
being
submitted
but
my
parents
somehow
manage
to
delay
the
inevitable
and
to
late
have
not
accepted
anybody’s
proposals
even
though
I
know
for
a
certain
that
my
sisters
are
very
happy
with
the
proposals.
Therefore,
the
question
is
that
if
the
parents
do
not
realise
their
responsibility,
is
it
within
the
rights
of
the
children
to
contract
the
marriage
because
both
parties
are
Muslims?
Answer:
In
this
day
and
age,
in
the
pursuit
of
higher
education
for
their
children,
parents
have
become
completely
unaware
of
the
importance
of
marriage
of
their
children.
The
children
fritter
away
the
important
years
of
their
life
in
the
complexities
of
university
life
and
when
the
time
has
past,
parents
come
to
their
senses.
I
have
received
thousands
of
letters
of
this
type
that
a
girl’s
age
has
reached
20-35
but
no
proposals
of
marriage
are
given,
and
if
proposals
do
come
they
are
soon
retracted.
Could
you
inform
me
of
any
act
or
sacred
note
or
prescription
by
which
the
girl’s
marriage
may
take
place?
Or,
the
girl
is
intelligent,
educated
and
of
acceptable
appearance
but
nobody
asks
for
her
hand
in
marriage.
Only
god
knows
how
many
families
have
drowned
in
this
flood
and
how
many
boys
and
girls
have
started
to
tread
the
immoral
path.
What
you
have
written
is
a
reality.
It
is
stated
in
a
tradition,
when
children
reach
puberty,
and
the
parents
neglect
getting
them
married,
(in
these
circumstances)
if
a
child
commits
a
sin
then
the
parents
will
be
equally
responsible
for
its
sin.
Concerning
the
question
that
if
the
parents
neglect
the
duty
of
the
marriage
of
their
children,
can
the
children
contract
their
own
marriage
through
a
court?
As
far
as
the
answer
is
concerned,
if
both
parties
are
of
the
same
(social)
status
in
every
respect,
(education,
lineage,
background,
etc.,)
then
marriage
will
be
in
order,
otherwise
not.
For
a
boy
to
get
married
somewhere
does
not
really
pose
a
problem,
but
for
a
girl
the
story
is
altogether
different,
but
whatever
the
situation.
If
a
girl
wants
to
marry
a
boy
it
is
vital
that
the
boy
is
compatible
with
the
girl
in
every
respect.
This
compatibility
in
the
language
of
jurisprudence
is
known
as
Kuff.
Question:
I
am
still
a
student
and
studying.
I
have
a
problem
which
is
that
I
want
to
get
married,
to
save
myself
from
sins
and
evil
of
today’s
society.
Please
answer
in
all
the
situations
listed
below:
(i)
I
have
not
enough
money
for
mehr
(dowry).
(ii)
If
I
borrow
the
money
how
much
I
need
then
repay
the
lender.
(iii)
My
parents
pay
for
the
whole
cost,
i.e.
mehr,
food,
clothes
etc.
(iv)
The
situation
became
worse,
i.e.
the
desire
increases
or
the
situation
becomes
out
of
control,
meaning
sodomy
or
zina
etc.
What
is
the
Shar’i
ruling
in
these
situations,
please
explain
in
detail
from
the
Qur’aan
and
Hadith.
Please
also
include
a
remedy
for
this
condition
if
marriage
does
not
taken
place.
Please
answer
in
such
a
way
that
the
person
attains
what
he
wants.
Answer:
Concerning
marriage,
it
is
stated
in
the
Hanafi
jurisprudence
book
'Durrul-Mukhtaar':
"If
a
person
feels
that
marriage
will
save
him
from
committing
zina
(fornication)
then
in
such
a
situation
marriage
becomes
obligatory
on
him,
under
less
astute
circumstances,
marriage
is
wajib,
and
under
normal
circumstances
and
conditions,
contracting
marriage
is
a
stressed
sunnah
(sunnat-e-muakkadah),
and
according
to
various
opinions,
wajib.
However
if
a
a
individual
feels
that
he
will
commit
cruelty
and
inflict
injustice
to
his
wife,
then
entering
in
to
wedlock
becomes
makrooh-e-tahreemi,
if
the
feeling
of
inflicting
cruelty
etc.,
is
replaced
by
utter
certainty
then
marriage
is
absolutely
forbidden."
Focusing
on
your
current
predicament,
the
most
prudent
and
wise
course
of
action
would
be
that
you
ask
your
parents
to
pay
the
wedding
costs
and
if
they
so
wish,
you
can
then
reimburse
them
later.
Bewitched?
Lustful
Gazes
&
Their
Cure
By
A
Student
of
Darul
Uloom,
Bury
Inter-Islam